Good Will Haunting
by FandomUnleashed204
Summary: The afterlife for Tony and Natasha left them stuck in the soul stone after they sacrificed their lives. But when they have an opportunity to escape offered by everyone's favorite cameo, they take it in a race against the clock with their very souls on the line in a desperate bid to prove their need to return to life. Rated T for (cue Cap) "Language!"
1. Chapter 1

Summary (Just because I wanted to put it here)

The afterlife for Tony and Natasha left them stuck in the soul stone after they sacrificed their lives. But when they have an opportunity to escape offered by everyone's favorite cameo, they take it in a race against the clock with their very souls on the line in a desperate bid to prove their need to return to life. Rated T for (cue Cap) "Language!"

* * *

Tony knew that he was dead. After all, no perfectly normal human (albeit a self-described genius billionaire playboy philanthropist) could wield the infinity stones and expect to live.

_At least Morgan isn't here to watch me die, _he reasoned. _Seeing it in person is so much worse. I hope to God she doesn't find that out the hard way, like me._

He felt his grip on reality itself slipping, washing away with a strange sense of peace taking its place in his final moments.

_Here it is. The big moment. Here lies Tony Stark, husband, father, and Avenger. In that order, or so help me, I will haunt the shit out of everybody. Going, going…_

And then he was gone. Or so he thought.

* * *

_What the hell?_

Tony was floating up through a layer of water. Normally, that would have been enough to bring on a panic attack, but the strange euphoria of dying at last still hadn't faded. He followed the light filtering through the surface above, taking his time until a hand plunged through and the savior of the universe was unceremoniously yanked from beneath the surface before being dumped in the shallows as he sputtered and coughed. Tony rolled onto his side and opened his eyes.

_What the actual hell? Is this even the real thing or…_

He was pretty sure that he was looking at a bland, knockoff version of hell. The landscape was made of shallow waters but kept the warm color scheme that he had imagined being introduced to upon his death. His vision of orange was tainted to a slowly focusing blur of black topped with bright red. _That looks familiar…_

"Tony? Oh, God, not you. It wasn't supposed to be you. Just me."

The figure knelt beside him and helped him upright with a surprising amount of strength. He sighed, rubbed his eyes, and greeted the blur with a knowing, "Hi Nat. Nice to know I'm not the only one in… wherever this is. It's not Malibu, but it'll do for now." He blinked, taking the familiar sight of the assassin in her black combat suit. She smiled sadly. "Tony."

"Natasha. Looks like we both remember each other's names. Where are we?"

"The soul stone," she replied softly. The pair stood, and walked together in comforting silence before Tony spoke again.

"How long were you waiting here with them?"

"It felt like weeks until you arrived. I was here alone, hearing their voices but I couldn't see anyone. I was convinced that I would be alone forever and that my death meant nothing until it all faded and you showed up."

"Is this all there is to this place?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

"Can you try and swim out?"

"You can't go below the surface at all. Believe me, I tried, and the only time I could was when I went to pull you out."

"So you're telling me that there's nothing to do besides annoy each other and wander endlessly on an unknown plane of existence? To be honest, I was expecting more demons with pitchforks and maybe a meet-and-greet with dead politicians."

Natasha's lips quirked up in a smile. "To hell with that idea. I thought you'd be headed somewhere with a halo over your head. A crooked one, but still a halo."

"Excuse me? I'd have that thing fixed and covered in glitter before you could say… hey, what's wrong? Seriously, is something bothering you, Red?" Tony said, before following her line of sight to a quaint scene of three cozy leather chairs in a circle around a fireplace, freshly materialized from out of nowhere.

"That… wasn't there before," he managed to say before resigning himself to stare at the gathering of furniture.

"Well no shit, Sherlock," she murmured, "What happened? Who did this?"

"That would be me," said a new voice coming from behind them. When the two whipped around, the voice chuckled from the chair nearest to the fireplace and the pair spun around again. "I didn't mean to spook you, but that was fun. Sit down, pull up a chair, we have a lot to catch up on."


	2. Chapter 2

The speaker was an old man with well-combed silver hair and eyes glittering with mirth snapped his fingers and Tony flinched at the sound before finding himself in the chair across from the man. Natasha appeared in the one next to him, shocked but looking ready for a fight.

"Make yourselves at home, it's not like anyone's leaving any time soon. So how's the stone been treating you?"

Tony was quick to reply. "Well, I just got here, you'd have to ask Nat over there."

"Who even are you?" asked Natasha, "And how did you get here?"

The newcomer smiled knowingly. "Just call me Stan, and I'm here to make you a deal."

"Wait, do I have to sell my soul? I'm pretty sure it belongs to the stone we're all stuck in, or Pepper," said Tony, "She would probably march in and take it back before you could even offer, just to warn you."

The man grinned. "Don't worry, you won't owe me anything. And Pepper isn't one even I would mess with." Tony visibly relaxed.

"What kind of deal are you offering? And, again- how did you even get here?" inquired Natasha.

Stan sighed. "Like the two of you, I am dead. But you could say that the stone and I go way back, and I don't feel like moving on quite yet. Say hello, stone."

There was a deep rumbling that gently shook the pocket of existence that the group was stuck in to its very core. Tony almost jumped out of his seat while Natasha shuddered. Stan merely smiled fondly.

"Now, what is it that the two of you want most? The stone is willing to release it's grip and let you move on to the peaceful afterlife that you've more than earned by now. If that's what you want, then you can follow me."

Natasha sucked in a small breath before speaking. "I doubt that where I would wind up would be any more pleasant than this, if it goes by what I've earned and the lives I've taken."

Tony looked at her incredulously. "Natasha, you gave up your life to give half of the universe a shot at returning. Long before that, you had whatever debt you think you owe to the world paid. If there's anyone that deserves moving on to something better-"

Natasha abruptly cut him off. "It's you. When you showed up, I knew it. We won. Thanos is gone, but you had to have been the one to sacrifice yourself to end it."

"Nat, I can't move on. I left it all behind, and not so that I could escape to a goddamn afterlife I didn't know existed. So Pepper, Morgan, Happy, Rhodey, Peter, the team, so _everyone_ could live, even if that meant I wouldn't," he shot back.

"I can't go either." she said softly.

Tony looked back at Stan, who had been watching the conversation with an observant, soulful look in his eyes. "It's settled. We can't go on, and we want- scratch that, we need a way back home."

The old man nodded. "I suspected as much. There's so much fight in people like you, and it looks like neither of you are done fighting yet. All you have to do is prove to the stone that you should go back. That the world will be better off with you back in it, that the legacy you have left isn't enough to keep it going. If you choose to rise to this final challenge and fail, the stone will claim your souls. It doesn't often come across such bright ones, but it would like to keep yours as company, from what it tells me."

"Why doesn't it just hold on to yours?" blurted Tony.

"There was no bargain with me. Just an old friendship allowing me to give you this chance, should you accept. I'm warning you though- no takesie-backsies." said Stan, eyes glinting mischievously.

Natasha nodded grimly. "I have nothing left to lose. I accept."

"I'm with her on this, we have friends and family to return to. I'm in." said Tony.

"Alright," said Stan. "Before we begin, there are a few rules. You will be able to interact with the world as if you were ghosts. Unfortunately, you cannot explicitly or obviously draw anyone's attention to the fact that it is you. Subtle actions, hints, and clues are the absolute most you can get away with when interacting with a specific person- they need to figure it out on their own, or not at all. Second, you only get a specific amount of power to use daily. The soul stone will only allow you to draw so much from it, but you will get better as you use it more often. And finally, I'm sticking around to offer some guidance and give you warnings as needed. Are you ready?"

Natasha and Tony made eye contact with each other before looking over at the man and nodding.

"Good luck, and see you around!" he said before waving a hand. For the two dead Avengers, the world spun around them at dizzying speeds before disappearing altogether in an orange haze.


	3. Chapter 3

The world slowly stopped spinning around Tony quickly enough for him to land flat on his ass in the path of a moving car and register the headlights of said car barreling straight at him.

"Oh, shit!" he yelped, shutting his eyes and waiting for the moment of impact… that never came.

The car passed clean through him with an airy whoosh that he barely felt, leaving him with a tingly sensation before the next ones ran his intangible form over, over and over again.

"NYC drivers are the best, am I right?" Natasha drawled sarcastically before floating over to Tony and pulling him up.

"Of course." he deadpanned. They walked out of the street, under a nearby streetlight, and then stood there for a moment, taking the sight of each other in. Each looked like they did when they were alive, except more transparent despite the color and subtle solidness of their forms.

"Where even is this in the city?" Tony asked.

Natasha looked around. "Queens. The clock in that shop window over there says that it's 6, and I'm guessing that it's six in the evening."

_Queens._ Tony's chest tightened. _Peter lives in Queens. I just have to find him, follow him, and find everyone else…_

"Hey. Tony. I know that the spider kid lives around here, but we need a plan and we need to figure out what we need to do and what we can actually do before we run off and burn ourselves out. Remember, there's a cap on our available magic or whatever you want to call it." Natasha said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "We'll get around to finding him, I promise. We just have to figure out where everyone else is, too."

Tony fixed his pleading brown eyes on her. "He's the closest one out of any of them. We can find him first. Please, Nat."

Her features softened. "Do you even know where to find him-"

"Good evening, New York City! Man, how I've missed you!" shouted a red and blue blur swinging by.

"That's him! Kid!" yelled Tony, sprinting through the air. "Peter, get your tiny, teenaged butt back here-"

"Tony, he can't hear you!" yelled Natasha, chasing after the other 'ghost' and catching him by the collar of his AC/DC shirt before dragging him to the top of a nearby building. "He can't hear you. As much as it hurts, we shouldn't do anything else before we find anyone else and see what we can do for them. Please."

Tony visibly deflated. "Sure. Fine. We can head upstate to headquarters. There's gotta be at least someone in the Avengers' Compound, or what's left of it." His agreement certainly didn't match the quiet misery in his tone or the empty look in his eyes, which followed the trail of webbing down the street.

"We'll see him again soon. I remember how to go there and flying is easier than I thought." Natasha said, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "You ready?"

"Yeah." he answered simply, and together they took off. Tony took to flying as a 'ghost' rather naturally. He whooped and soared too far ahead of Natasha's controlled gliding before circling back to her side, often with an impressive looking aerial maneuver. After all, he had spent years fighting in a flying metal suit, and it almost looked like he was still wearing one with the similar way he moved across the sky. Natasha, on the other hand, flew with fluid grace and ease that reflected years of discipline as a dancer. She guided Tony to the compound, seeing as there was no Friday to do the job for him, but he seemed to know which way they were going.

From both far away and above, the compound looked like an unfinished lego set rather than the equivalent of a demolished one that Tony was expecting. There was slow but thorough activity from construction crews below, who were set on clearing out the rubble and preserving as much as they could of the original structures before continuing the repairs.

"They've been busy. How long has it even been?" asked Tony.

"I don't know yet," admitted Natasha. "Let's see who's even down there and figure it out."

"So mission-oriented. I'm glad that you wound up sticking around me long enough to know the definition of fun," grumbled Tony.

The spy raised an eyebrow. "Clint did that first, and I'm more than confident in saying that our definitions of fun must be very different, Stark."

"Now there's the Natasha I've been waiting for this whole time!" he crowed. "C'mon, let's go see if Rhodey's around here somewhere. I promised him way back in college to haunt the living shit out of him if I died first."

Natasha smirked. "There's the Tony _I've _been waiting for this whole time. I want in on haunting the shit out of your best friend, too."

"Last one there's a rotten egg!" Tony shouted, diving down towards the residential area.

Natasha let out a low chuckle before plummeting after him.

* * *

_Somewhere in Queens, less than an hour earlier…_

Peter's spider-senses were giving off a small tingle as he swung through the city for the first time in what felt like ages. Normally, he would have ignored the sensation because his senses were always going off whenever he was out, giving him subtle signals that were almost purely instinctual to react to by now. But this sensation was different, as if he had a form of built-in radar he didn't even know about picking up a blip for the first time.

_Wait, two tiny blips? _

Under the mask, he frowned. The feeling faded almost as abruptly as it came, as if he was getting out of range way too quickly.

_That's really weird. Maybe I should ask Mr. Stark about what I should do about new spider-sense feelings- oh. Right._

Peter teared up. Thank god his mask was so absorbent on the inside. He swung onto the side of a building and crawled to the roof. He couldn't sense any nearby security cameras or other threats to his secret identity, so he pulled the mask off and let the tears fall.

"Why did it have to be him? He was a good man that didn't deserve it. Just like Ben. And my parents, from what I hear and kinda remember. I want him back, just like anybody else with half a brain or heart, because he had both," Peter pleaded with the universe. "Just like they said- whatever it takes."

Fortunately, the universe had answered before he even asked.

* * *

**Author's Note: I haven't been all that active as a writer for a while now, so my apologies for anybody trying to keep up with my other (rather messy) story. I don't recommend checking it out until I'm done, trust me. Hope you're all liking it so far, please review!**


	4. Chapter 4

Laughing maniacally, Tony swooped clean through the ceiling and wound up in the common area just seconds ahead of Natasha, who dropped into a classic 'superhero landing' pose.

"Not fair!" said Tony in a mock pout. "You had a more dramatic entrance than me, and that's just not allowed."

Natasha pretended to toss her hair back over her shoulders. "Oh really? You were here first, so I suppose that makes us even."

"Fiiiiiiiiiiine," Tony whined, but the casual grin on his face gave away his amusement. "Rhodey should be closest one to us. And if I know Rhodey, he's either in his room, in the gym, lurking in his office, or isn't even here. This way!"

Natasha followed Tony to his best friend's suite and despite knowing exactly where it was and which walls that they had to pass through, they floated through the halls of their former home as if they were walking through it on a normal day. She could see that he was vibrating with excitement and didn't want to spoil the moment for him, so she simply trailed along. Tony paused outside the door. And there it was, the moment of truth. All he had to do was step through the door.

"You don't have to knock anymore, you know," murmured Natasha, who wasn't entirely sure of what to do.

Tony snorted but shuffled forward hesitantly. He looked back over his shoulder and said, "You don't have to stick around for this, even if you think you owe it to us. I'll meet you in the gym at sunset, which should be in a few. Maybe you'll find-" Tony paused, realizing that mentioning Clint and maybe falsely raising her hope wouldn't be a great idea. "Someone." But he knew that she had probably figured out what he was about to say, regardless. She nodded before turning away, and he would never ask whether that glittering sheen that he glimpsed in her eyes was tears threatening to fall.

Tony turned back around, took a deep breath, and stepped into Rhodey's room, just like when he had first entered their shared dorm room that first day at MIT.

And there he was, back turned to Tony and working at his desk, it's Rhodey. "So much damn paperwork," the man grumbled to himself. "Take care of the records, they said. It will be easy, they said."

For a moment, Tony just hovered there, transfixed and eyes watering. But the pure elation rushing through him took over and he rushed forward. "Rhodey!" Tony squealed like a toddler presented with a massive dessert carried in by a team of puppies just after being made to eat green beans.

He threw his arms around his friend, but was thrown off when his entire form passed through the man. Tony stumbled before stopping inside the middle of desk, upset but realizing his mistake. Rhodey looked up, and only for a moment he thought that maybe they had made eye contact. Maybe Tony had done a good enough job of sneaking up on him that he had caught his friend by surprise during a prank for the first time in years. Maybe they would both shriek, startled and then elated, before catching up on how Tony could break a few laws of nature and science and maybe he would truly return to life.

But then again, _maybe's _don't make the moon made out of cream cheese.

Rhodey pulled himself up from the chair and dropped his legs into two large footprints on the ground that looked like futuristic sandals without any straps. His partial nanotech exoskeleton formed around his legs in almost the blink of an eye, sending Tony into a trip down memory lane.

* * *

_It was a few years after the snap, and Tony was up late tinkering in his garage at home. Pepper was asleep and he had put Morgan to bed a while ago. Tony looked over the designs for R-Exo Mark 11, named and designed for Rhodey. He had sped up the rate at which the nanobots assembled into the braces so that his friend wouldn't have to worry about falling over while putting them on. He still needed to add some finishing touches, namely a bunch of fancy gadgets and utilities that Rhodey would either exasperatedly and dramatically sigh or smile in appreciation at. Unfortunately, he was fresh out of ideas and energy but full of the urge to build something in a way that wouldn't wake Pepper up or burn down the house. Programming and testing nanotech qualified as both unless he wanted to work on making flamethrowers, which he didn't feel like doing that evening. He also didn't feel like explaining the inevitable chaos to Pepper if Morgan ever found one. _

_There was a soft shuffling noise coming from the cracked doorway, and he whipped around just in time to catch a glimpse of his daughter ducking out of sight. He thought about what to do next, settling on something fun and the opposite of what Howard Stark would have done: Open the door and play hide-and-seek. _

"_Was that a mouse?" he asked loudly. There was a giggle behind the door as he approached and slowly turned it open, giving Morgan a chance to duck behind a tall, ugly potted plant to his right that he hadn't yet talked to Pepper about getting rid of in favor of another bookshelf. He started searching for nothing in particular to his left._

"_I sure hope there isn't a mouse sneaking into my garage looking for juice pops!" he whisper-yelled quietly, just enough to not wake Pepper and entertain Morgan. In the corner of his eye, he saw her tiptoeing into the garage, hopping down the steps, and disappearing from his line of sight entirely. Instantly he turned back and returned, scanning the room for all possible Morgan hiding spots. He was pretty sure she was in a conveniently located cardboard box which was still half-filled with styrofoam packing peanuts. She loved hiding in it, and thankfully most choking hazards like the little styrofoam monsters no longer freaked her parents out because Morgan was better than most kids her age at determining what objects qualified as food. _

_Tony spotted the lampshade and snuck up behind the box. "If I was a mouse, I'd be hiding in this box right here." To her credit, Morgan didn't giggle that time. Especially considering she wasn't even in the box, which Tony noticed much too late. Now he was silently freaking out because she was loose in the garage and had probably chosen a dangerous spot. He took a deep breath and resorted to parenting tactic number two: Bribery. _

"_Wow, the mouse is doing a great job at hiding. But I don't know if hiding mice get juice pops because they can't ask nicely to get them…" Tony said enticingly. _

_A moment later, a cabinet door hanging at about __**his freaking eye level **__swung open. "Daaaadeeeee, can I please have a juice pop?" Morgan sang, grinning at having evaded, startled, and partially tricked her father into offering treats. Tony ran a hand over his face and brought his daughter onto his back with a sigh. "Sure thing, kiddo. How did you even get up there?" he asked. He felt her shrug. "I climbed." Kids. He was pretty sure that they could teleport until they hit ten years old, and Morgan was no exception._

_Five minutes later, Tony was showing Morgan the nanotech and listening to her ideas on cool stuff it could do for her Uncle Rhodey. Half of the suggestions were weapons of some kind, simply weren't possible, or just plain terrified him. Could he even make glitter bombs combined with a chemical that would subtly make people sneeze? Would Rhodey even like an automatic marshmallow shooter? And most importantly, how did she know how to spell napalm? But in the end, he was ready to incorporate quite a few of their traded ideas into the design, such as the beloved repulsor boots, a tool belt, emergency buttons, a small candy dispenser that didn't shoot the candy out, roller skates, and a gray camo pattern all over. _

"_The best part is that if Uncle Rhodey doesn't need one of these cool things, the nanobots in it go back to being parts of the whole thing." Tony explained. "And look at the time! You should be back in bed, sleeping so you're not tired tomorrow."_

_Morgan frowned, and for a second he thought she would protest. "It's missing something." she said, looking at the structure on the table. "You call Uncle Rhodey a plat-pus, right?"_

"_Yes, I call Rhodey a platypus."_

"_Can we put a plat-pus on it?"_

"_Yes, and I'm sure that he'll love it."_

_Rhodey thought it was funny that Morgan had been the one to suggest the cartoon platypus decal formed by the nanobots. There wasn't an override to that upgrade unless it was an emergency where they were needed elsewhere._

_He wouldn't ever think of using it if it did exist, anyway._

* * *

As Tony was looking at the picture of the venomous mammal on his friend's left ankle, he was struck with an idea. Nothing cheered up his friend like a good, harmless prank, and if that didn't work, he'd maybe brighten at seeing that his paperwork was finished by the time he was done with his break. Tony hovered in a sitting position just above the seat of the chair and grabbed at a pen, but his hand swiped clean through it. He tried again, pouring concentration and deliberation into the action. No luck. He switched tactics, this time around appealing to the soul stone for help and magic. _C'mon. This is for Rhodey. He's been with me since as long as I actually want to remember and I can help him out for what feels like the first time in forever. _

A tingling spread from the center of Tony's body out to his hands, and he found that he could pick the pen up. Unfortunately, he couldn't make heads or tails of the complicated forms. _Screw paperwork, no wonder he was grouchy over these things. _In a last-ditch effort to surprise his friend, he asked for some help. _Hey stone, where can I find an actual platypus?_ The same tingling feeling pulsed and disappeared, leaving him as tired as an insomniac koala. But nothing had happened.

"Really? All that for absolutely nothing? Stupid little-" Just as Tony was in the middle of complaining, there was a loud splashing noise coming from the bathroom. He quickly floated in, and spotted a platypus swimming happily in the toilet. He could swear that the little thing even winked at him before knocking into the side hard enough to drop the lid. There was no doubt in his mind that FRIDAY was alerting Rhodey to the strange noises in his room, but even she probably had no idea that it was a platypus. Now he had to just wait and see.

* * *

_Author's Note: I think that this was one of the biggest chapters I've written. Hope you enjoyed it, and I might set up a regular updating schedule._


	5. Chapter 5

Natasha found herself slinking into the gym, tracing the distinctive clang of metal on metal that happened about once every thirty seconds, followed immediately by groans, curses, and taunts. She smirked at the sight of Barnes and Wilson playing an intense game of frisbee with none other than the shield of Captain America, in all of its shiny, spangly glory. She was waiting for Steve to come out any second now, roll his eyes with a grin, and either send them off to dinner or on a series of increasingly difficult drills. Barnes flung the shield back at Sam, who caught it just in time to raise it against an onslaught of beanbags. Sam dropped the shield to glare and stick his tongue out at Bucky but immediately took a beanbag to the head.

"Shithead." Sam cussed.

"Language, Cap!" snickered Bucky, who caught the shield to the stomach with an 'oof.'

_Cap?_ _Where was Rogers if Wilson got the title? _Natasha wondered. _I'll have to stick around to get to the bottom of this. _

"You're improving, but if you want to see over the top without getting your head blown off it's all in the way you hold the damn thing," said Barnes. "Machine gun looking your way. What do you do?"

"Get cover if there's nobody to cover first," answered Sam automatically.

"That hunk of painted vibranium _is_ your damn cover if nothing else is an option. It currently isn't," Barnes grabbed a paintball gun. "Embrace your inner turtle, Wilson. Get down."

He started shooting as fast as he could, barely giving Sam enough time to drop into a crouch behind the entirety of the shield. Paintballs danced across the metal, pinging as they burst open and splattered their payload everywhere. Natasha looked on with a smirk, impressed at how well the soldier was adapting to the new weapon. Thank God that the two were getting along…

When Bucky finally ran out of ammo after yelling directions for Sam to roll under the cover of the shield, Sam dropped it and lunged after him in a massive tackle. The two started yelling and then it turned into a wrestling match, with Bucky's metal arm making loud clanging noises after each hit to the floor.

Well, maybe they weren't getting along perfectly. At least they didn't have to squabble over space in a tiny car again.

The door to the gym opened and a rather familiar looking old man walked in. Natasha could see more years than she expected on his face despite his well-kept build. Whoever it was certainly aged well. She frowned, unable to place where she had seen him before, and she found that very unsettling.

The man merely snorted at Wilson and Barnes, who looked up with shit-eating grins on their faces.

"Hey, Cap," said Sam.

"Hey yourself, Cap," replied the old man, smiling wryly. "Nice to see that you two haven't killed each other yet."

_Cap? That's him?_

Bucky rolled out from under Sam and put him in a headlock with his metal arm, rubbing the knuckles of his free hand all over Sam's head as the other man kicked. "Yeah, well this crazy birdman-" Bucky grunted, cut off by a particularly powerful kick.

"Kicked you right where it hurts. How's it going, Rogers?" Sam replied, slipping out of the headlock and pinning Bucky to the floor.

"Good. How are you two whippersnappers doing?" chuckled the old man.

Bucky heaved Sam off and sprung at the him in a tackle. "Just fine, punk. How's the wife?"

"Jerk," said Rogers automatically. "She's doing well. I talked to some people, pulled a few strings and she's almost cured of her Alzheimer's. The drugs that did it should actually hit the market in a month or two. It's 2023, I saw it all coming, and I still can't get over the miracles of science, medicine, and all these new-fangled doohickeys."

Natasha hovered closer to the group and couldn't help but stare. This was Steve Rogers? Did he get stuck in the past at some point, presumably after returning the borrowed infinity stones? And what was this about a wife? Oh. _Oh._ She put the pieces together. If he was this old now, it would be about the same age as Peggy Carter if she had survived Alzheimer's, and it seemed as if she did. It made some sense to Natasha. Steve had never really gotten over her and had maybe used the last of the Pym particles that were meant for the return trip to find her. She was really going to have to ask Tony about how the time heist turned out, because she was going off of more assumptions than she preferred in her narrative.

Sam snorted and continued wrestling with Bucky, grabbing beanbags and pelting him in the face with as many of them as he could. "Congrats, man. Hey Ducky, you're welcome to join him in retirement."

"Fat chance, Wilson," Bucky stood and picked Sam up by the collar with his mechanical arm, lifting the winged Avenger over his head. "Hey Stevie, want to play some catch like we did back in the good old days?"

"PUT. ME. DOWN. Or so help me, raccoon man…"

Steve grinned. "I'll pass, but are either of you young men up for a game of frisbee with this crazy old coot?"

Natasha smiled and watched the game, surprised at the old Cap's strength and teaching ability. He was performing similarly to Sam and giving him both pointers and examples to learn from. While she was alive, she had never really had the chance to learn from him. There wasn't much that she needed to learn from him, and he just needed to play team leader if they were working together. But with someone to pass the torch to, she could see Steve was doing a good job of teaching someone how to hold it. There wasn't much for her to do besides wait for an opportunity to reach one of them or wait for them to drop some intel on Clint. She really didn't feel like sneaking into his quarters to find them bare and miss out on something or walk in on him ruining the very concept of music by singing in the shower.

There are only so many times someone can listen to a terribly sung version of 'Sweet Caroline' on a stakeout before they feel like snapping whenever they hear it again.

* * *

Tony was getting impatient, as most pranksters do when the very best of their pranks are being delayed. Would he ever get the sweet, sweet satisfaction of giving his dear Platypus a real platypus on his very first day of haunting the shit out of everyone? He just wished there was someone else to see it and enjoy it with him…

_Natasha! Of course!_ Tony thought, soundlessly smacking himself in the face. He had to find Natasha quickly, before Rhodey came back, so they could both see it.

"Natasha! NATASHA! NATASHAAAAAA!" Tony shrieked, tearing through the hallways in search of the gym. Unbeknownst to him, there would be two victims and ghost witnesses for the price of one if he wound up getting the timing right…

* * *

_Author's Note: Yes, I delayed the platypus prank reveal for another chapter, but I had an idea to sweeten the deal and expand it to the focus of an entire chapter. It's almost like this whole thing is writing itself, but it's the story that's moving slowly. Expect a chapter or two to reintroduce everybody and give our 'ghosts' an action plan._


	6. Chapter 6

_Author's Note: Content! More content! Content with a kick! Content with a…_

_So I did a thing. This is it, jam-packed with flashbacks. What can I say? I love a good backstory. If you don't like flashbacks, then skip over the italicized portion. _

_This comes in as one of the largest chapters I've ever written, at well over 5,000 words. But don't worry, you __**will**_ _get to see the platypus reveal. Special thanks to all of you who read, review, follow and favorite the story! You know who you are. Each and every one of you make writing this worth it._

_Enough of the sappy stuff, folks. Enjoy!_

* * *

Natasha was left in an empty gym when the group of three disbanded. They had finally made a retirement joke about Steve and Clint that told her everything she needed to know. Her oldest friend was undoubtedly back at home on his midwestern farm with the family that she had also missed being a part of.

_What if Tony and I split up? We could get more done with our own friends and family by ourselves._

Natasha's train of thought was abruptly cut off by the sound of Tony screeching out her name. She rushed to where he was flying through the hallways and they collided, bouncing off of each other in midair.

"What is it, Tony? I did some eavesdropping on Rogers, Barnes, and Wilson in the gym and you need to know-"

"SorryaboutthatitcanwaitjustcomewithmereallyquicklyyougottaseethisNat!" he yelped.

"Can you repeat that, except slowly?" Natasha asked, wildly confused as to what Tony spat out.

"No time- Rhodey- toilet- now!" Tony gasped, grabbing her by the hand and shooting back to Rhodey's rooms.

* * *

James Rhodes was taking a break from the seemingly never-ending series of forms and other mind-numbing important papers to fill out when a flood of memories hit him like a freight train. He sat down on a nearby bench outside of Pepper's official office and closed his eyes, reminiscing.

* * *

_**Massachusetts Institute of Technology, decades ago…**_

_A much younger James Rhodes returns to his dorm room and AC/DC blaring. A tinier version of Tony Stark is standing on top of his desk, playing an imaginary guitar to the music and kicking his papers and homework everywhere. _

"_Tony! What are you doing?" _

"_Rhodey! I told you I would be studying when you got back, and I heard about this one study on, um, how multitasking is a great idea, so I decided to throw on some music, and this really isn't what it looks like…"_

"_Tony, do I need to get you some mouthwash?"_

"_No, why would I need mouthwash?"_

"_Because you're talking a whole lot of bullshit and I can smell it from here. I brought back some snacks, so let's just try and study for finals."_

"_Snacks! Thank you, my dearest platypus! And we both know we're gonna ace finals anyway, so how about we enjoy these last couple of weeks we have together before we leave for summer break and then at long last reunite in the fall?" Tony said dramatically._

"_You would make a killing as an actor, Tones. But seriously, we both need to review. The professors aren't going to make it easy for the students who think they can just wing it. Heck, there's even a rumor going around campus that one of the teachers accidentally made his study guide word for word from the final exam in his course. That's just even more motivation to just start studying already. Neither of us can afford to screw this one up, okay?"_

"_Okay. I'll get the radio if you pass me the chips."_

"_Deal."_

_They managed to get twenty solid minutes of studying before Tony started to get antsy. Rhodey could tell that he was internally stressing out about his schoolwork but trying to pass it off with his nonchalant attitude towards the exams. Tony wasn't nearly as subtle as he thought he was, and it certainly didn't help that he had been acting strangely in their shared classes over the upcoming tests._

"_Alright. Let's take a break," said Rhodey. "Is there anything you want to do before we get back to it?"_

_Tony looked up, surprised. "Well, there is one thing I wanna do…"_

"_What is it?"_

"_Can we go up to the roof and set some of our old papers on fire? I already have a firepit set up, and a couple of fire extinguishers... and some lighters… and some hairspray if we want to make improv flamethrowers…" Tony said, somewhat embarrassed and shy._

"_You had this planned, didn't you?"_

"_Yeah…" he replied sheepishly. "If you don't wanna we don't have to…"_

"_It sounds great already, man. Let's go." At that, Tony lit up with a wicked grin that almost made him regret agreeing to it._

_Almost._

_And so Rhodey was introduced to Tony's war on paperwork. Thankfully, the two managed to escape notice from campus police and not set a building on fire. The partially burned off eyebrows, however, were another story, and caught a lot of questioning glances from students and staff alike. It certainly wasn't the last time that Tony pulled off something entertaining with important papers he didn't want to work on._

* * *

_**Stark Enterprises Building. California.**_

_Rhodey walked into Tony's seldom used office on business from the military. They wanted designs for a new stealth missile capable of destroying an entire city and escaping detection until the very last second. Justin Hammer's company had already bungled the job with a series of duds and weapons too heavy to get themselves off of the ground, and he had hoped that Tony hadn't heard about that mess quite yet. He knocked on the door and heard a far too enthusiastic "Come in!" than to his liking. _

_He opened the door and promptly ducked as a paper airplane soared over his head. Tony cackled from his desk, feet propped up and another one prepared for throwing. Rhodey cussed under his breath. _

"_Rhodey! What a pleasure it is to see you this fine Thursday morning. Oh, and did you hear about that one missile HammerTech utterly failed at making for the government? What. A. Shame. Honey Bear, if they wanted it done right, they should have came to me," Tony flashed a winning smile and stood up, arms spread wide. "I wonder if that has anything to do with your visit."_

"_You got me there, you little shit." Rhodey embraced his friend. "What's with the paper airplanes, Tones?"_

"_Pepper dropped off some order forms I have to sign off on. They're done, she isn't expecting them until later, so I thought that a little bit of rebellion might cure the boredom. I even arranged them in neat little rows all over my desk by design. Let's talk and fly a few."_

_It was a very entertaining meeting, despite Rhodey's initial protests. They eventually came to a decision after hitting each other with paper airplanes, throwing them at targets all around the room, and trying to outdo each other's designs. Only much later did Rhodey realize that there was a paper airplane somehow stuck in the leg of his pants. It was mailed back a few days later, not to Tony but to Pepper. The look on Tony's face when he was confronted about the paper airplane that should have been signed and turned in days earlier must have been priceless, because the passive-aggressive thank you letter from Pepper certainly was._

* * *

_**Avengers Compound, 2017.**_

_Rhodey hated meetings with Ross, holographic or not, and he knew that Tony felt the same way. Lately, however, Tony was acting very strangely at meetings, namely because they were concerning Spider-Man. He knew that there was something going on between his friend and the vigilante, seeing as there was no way that the kid had been recruited to fight during the Avengers' 'Civil War', escaped Ross' notice for so long, gotten help during incidents on a ferry and on the beach of Coney Island, and acquired a high-tech suit without Tony's help. Ross had given Tony an ultimatum: Bring Spider-Man in and have him sign the Accords or get in big trouble and have someone else do the job for him. Ross had even sent forms to leave a paper trail, which had taken months to draft, and had digital copies of backup drafts if something had happened to the paper copies he had sent. There was no getting out of this for Tony. _

_Or so Ross had thought. _

_Tony was already late to the meeting when he walked in, carrying two baskets. One of them had the compliance and acceptance forms, and the other had a blender and fresh fruits. Murmurs spread throughout the other projections of people at the table and Ross scowled. Rhodey concealed his light amusement. _

"_Stark."_

"_Ross. I imagine my family name is rather unforgettable, nice to see that you haven't done the impossible and failed to recall it."_

_The general was fuming already. If you asked Rhodey, this was shaping up to be either hilarious, a disaster, or a potentially explosive combination of the two._

"_What is the meaning of this?"_

"_Oh. This stuff? It's my breakfast. Hey FRIDAY, pull up my recipes and the original shared files of the forms. Let's talk business," Tony replied. Rhodey could tell that he was up to no good with his passive-aggressive and apathetic behavior, but it was the subtle, nervous quavering in his voice that gave it away. What was he trying to do?_

_Ross' eyebrow twitched as he began his speech. Some nonsense about Spider-Man being a danger to the public until he signed the Accords. Tony prepared a smoothie, and just as Ross launched into the angry portion dragging Spider-Man's name through the mud, Tony started blending._

"_As I was saying, Spider-Man is a reckless, unregistered vigilante who-"_

_VRR-RRR rrrr!_

"_Ahem! Just as a trustworthy source says, Spider-Man is a menace capable of destroying-"_

_VRR-RRR rrrr!_

"_According to the-"_

_VRR-RRR rrrr!_

"_Spider-Man is a-"_

_VRR-RRR rrrr!_

"_Stark! Would you stop that?"_

"_Don't worry, I'm almost done," Tony deadpanned, pouring the brightly colored mixture into two large glasses and sampling it. He made a face. "It needs more ice." _

_The other holographic members of the committee sighed in relief. Getting ice wouldn't be nearly as noisy, right? _

_They couldn't have been farther from the truth._

_Ross continued his speech, stopping as a series of very loud clicking and clunking noises came from the nearby kitchen._

"_What is it now? Colonel Rhodes, stop that noise at once!"_

_Rhodey, to his credit, kept a completely straight face. "Tony is getting ice. You wouldn't like him when he's hangry."_

_Ross glowered at the reference to the Hulk and waited until Tony came back with ice in a bucket and another glass to continue. Tony chugged down the contents of his glass, poured the contents of the other full one back into the blender with a loud splorp noise that interrupted Ross again, and dumped the ice in just as the speech was starting to build into something serious. The cold, pissed off look in Tony's eyes betrayed the innocent expression on his face as he continued to interrupt the speech. When he was finished blending, he poured the smoothies, passed one to Rhodey with an unnecessary clunk and slide across the table, but he was careful to not spill any. Tony finished off the entire contents of the blender and listened to Ross' blabbering with the other people in the meeting, but the speech had already lost most of its intended effectiveness because of the constant, distracting soundtrack Tony had provided. The man himself was muttering about recipe issues while sneezing occasionally at big moments in the monologue and working on something on one of the holographic screens FRIDAY was showing to him- and only him. Even Rhodey couldn't see it through the opaque background of the projection._

_When Ross finally finished his speech, Tony got up to put away the last glass, offer Rhodey another round, and grab ingredients. He returned with lemons, water, coffee, and ice. The bags under his eyes seemed to have grown in size. Tony chugged the coffee and started to put ingredients into the blender, starting with the water. The repetitive hand motions distracted Rhodey from what went in next, but it didn't escape the notice of the other members of Ross' captive audience. The gasps and pointing brought his attention back to Tony before Ross cut off his droning and turned around. _

_Tony had dropped the documents into the blender, topped them with ice, and tiredly threw in a bunch of unpeeled lemons. He was rubbing his eyes and moving for the on switch. _

"_STARK! Don't do it!" roared Ross, who had just registered the alarming contents of the blender._

_Tony looked up and stared Ross down, making deliberate eye contact. "Don't do what?" he said, confused. He hit the button._

_It took everything Rhodey had to not bust out laughing at the looks on everyone's faces. It was a card well played if he wanted to annoy the shit out of Ross and disrupt the meeting, but there had to be an ace up his friend's sleeve in a matter as serious as this. Spider-Man's ability to work freely and his secret identity were on the line._

"_Oh. Oh shit, I'm sorry. FRIDAY, print me another copy of those forms, will you?" Tony asked._

"_Sir, I'm afraid that the file has been compromised by an outside source and our printers are down for maintenance. Perhaps Secretary Ross can enlighten us as to why the file has been successfully hacked?" Even FRIDAY sounded apologetic._

"_WHAT? Stark, if you tampered with the documents, I will have you ruined! It was foolproof!" yelled Ross, on the verge of a Hulk-sized temper tantrum._

"_First of all, it was not me. FRIDAY can verify that the only thing I was working on this whole time were recipes that I post under a pseudonym online. FRIDAY, send him the smoothie files, please." Tony replied with an even tone, but anyone in the room, digitally or not, could tell that he was simmering with rage._

"_Will do, sir."_

"_Secondly, don't you dare to even think about bringing me down over your mistake. You set this thing up in a perfectly hackable system. Any high schooler with a computer could lay waste to the oh-so-secure drafts alone. If you had taken me up on the cybersecurity offer, it might have cost a pretty penny but it sure as hell would have prevented this from happening."_

_Not content in his humiliation of Secretary Ross quite yet, Tony continued._

"_And finally, do not take me for a fool. I signed those damn Accords, yes, but I have contacts: Lawyers, the media, more politicians than you could even think about threatening- and I know about that, Ross, because I did some digging. I can and will tear this whole thing you have going apart if you so much as look at me and my allies funny again. Good luck trying to re-do all of those documents. I'll be waiting. And in the meantime, you should just leave Spider-Man alone. He isn't a threat or a menace, he sticks close to home, and he's done more for the good of the people than you have in your entire life. Frankly, this entire thing has been a waste of time and resources while the real hunt should be for whoever was able to hack such important files. I'm out of here."_

_Tony practically stomped out before turning around. He looked at Rhodey, smiled, and changed his tone entirely. "Rhodey, dear, I left you a smoothie in the fridge. There's another one if you want it, but if you don't, Pepper can have it too. No strawberries in it and it's the one with a purple umbrella. Yours has a pink one. I'm going to take a nap."_

_Ross, red-faced and ready to explode, barely managed to sputter out a simple "Meeting adjourned." There was no doubt that he was facing an investigation based on Tony's claims, but he would be back. Maybe with his tail tucked between his legs, maybe not. _

_Rhodey took a moment to just sit there after the call ended and soak it all in. And then all of the laughter he had been holding back burst over the dam and he found himself caught in a fit of laughter for the next ten minutes. Later, he asked for the footage to be played as he drank his smoothie and wound up snorting it on accident. _

"_Damn, does Tony hate paperwork," he said while cleaning. He heard a blender noise from the recording and lost it all over again._

* * *

The memories passed and Rhodey was left with tears in his eyes and a smile on his face. He wiped them away, got up, and knocked on the door to Pepper's office.

"Come in!"

Rhodey walked in and saw Pepper sorting through mounds of paperwork and folders on her desk, accompanied by an open laptop and a box of tissues. Her eyes were red and puffy, and Rhodey figured that she was crying recently, unless someone had made the mistake of sending her strawberries.

"Hey Pepper. Is now a bad time?"

"No, it's fine, have a seat," she said. He noticed that she was twisting her ring around.

"What are you up to?" Rhodey asked.

"Old paperwork, new paperwork, paperwork we never got pdfs or electronic copies of- I'm sorting it all. When I'm done I'm heading home to Morgan," she replied, sifting through the nearest pile and redistributing papers, typing away with her free hand.

"Pepper, it's almost sundown. Why don't you take a break and come back to it tomorrow?"

"I can't. I have to get it done. There was so much he left behind. Tony, he… He…"

"He always hated paperwork. I know, Pepper. It's okay if you don't want to tell me, but what's really on your mind?"

Pepper turned away from the computer, put her hands in her lap, took a deep breath, and composed herself. But that all went to hell when their eyes met and the tears finally broke free.

"James, it's been impossible to sift through everything Tony left behind. It has to be done but it's so hard to look at all of these little pieces of him day after day… I can barely look Morgan in the eyes when she asks about whether he's really gone forever, or when her face falls when she sees that whoever at the door isn't him. Just when I had finally thought that any child of ours could grow up in a world with him in it, we lost him. It was his time, I wanted to let him go and move on, but I don't know if I ever can!"

Pepper broke her composure altogether and started sobbing uncontrollably, but still trying desperately to get it under control. Rhodey moved closer and passed her the entire tissue box.

"Pepper. Pepper. It's okay. He was trying to hold on, and you gave him permission to just go and rest. He needed that to move on in peace, that was the best thing you could have done for him, and you had the strength to do it in his final moments. He loved you so much and wouldn't want you to go through this, so don't burn yourself out in the aftermath. I know it hurts to do this and raise Morgan at the same time, but you're so damn strong and you've got the rest of us. Let's just take this a day at a time and go home for the night. It'll all be here tomorrow and so will I. It's okay to feel like this, Pepper. We're all here for you."

Pepper cried into his shoulder from across the desk and eventually calmed down and gave a bittersweet smile.

"Thank you, Rhodey. You meant so much to him too. Even though Tony's gone," her voice trembled slightly and she paused, wiping away the final tear. "You'll always be a part of the Stark family. You always have been."

Rhodey smiled and she could see the tears gathering in his eyes. "Thanks, Pepper. How about we pack up before-"

A loud chiming noise came from the ceiling as an alert from FRIDAY. "Good evening, Boss. Rhodey, there seems to be a problem in your quarters. More specifically, my audio sensors have detected loud bumping and splashing noises coming from your bathroom. I'm afraid I don't know much more than that, seeing as no cameras are installed in private areas. Shall I send someone to investigate?" The A.I. chirped.

"I'll check it out, FRIDAY. Thanks." Rhodey sighed.

"I'll go with you. It's about time I go home, and I can stop there on the way out." Pepper said.

"Sure. We better get there quick, though. I have a bad feeling about this…"

Little did they know, they weren't the only ones heading back to Rhodey's rooms. The race was on.

Tony was forging ahead, yanking Natasha through walls, hallways, and a custodian who promptly yelped and dropped a trash can, while cackling madly the whole way. Natasha was cursing in Russian until she finally managed to yank him back mere inches from the door to Rhodey's room.

"What the hell is going on?" she asked, concerned and pissed off at the same time.

"I put a platypus in Rhodey's toilet. We gotta beat him back and I hope he's not inside already. This is gonna be hilarious, Nat! Watch and learn." Tony replied.

"You said almost the exact same thing about replacing Thor's Pop-Tarts with cardboard replicas and his coffee with decaf on April Fool's Day, and for how many days were you hiding in the vents?"

"Long enough, but this should go over better!" he shot back. "C'mon, I hear footsteps already. Let's hide in the shower."

She followed him into Rhodey's neat rooms and slipped behind the shower's sliding glass door, crouching beside Tony. The two were concealed further by the towel hanging in front of them on the door's towel rack.

The sound of two voices got closer and closer as Tony and Natasha waited, with Tony practically vibrating in anticipation. The only other noises that he could hear were the sloshing of toilet water, the soft whirring of the air conditioning, and the sounds of his own breathing combined with that of Natasha's. The door to the hallway opened with a click and he could eavesdrop at last.

He picked out Rhodey's voice as the last one to be speaking, but he completely froze over who the other one belonged to. _Don't. Don't give yourself that hope. It couldn't be…_

Natasha's ears perked up ever so slightly- it was one of her almost imperceptible tells Tony had picked up on over the years. "Shh, Tony. It's okay. It's okay. Here it is, just relax and enjoy it," she whispered soothingly.

All Tony could do was nod and watch the door to the bathroom, transfixed. The handle slowly turned, and then stopped as Rhodey announced, "If there's somebody in there, come on out, nice and slow with your hands where we can see them, or prepare to get your ass blasted to kingdom come. Especially if it's you, Wilson."

It was dead silent for a moment. Even the platypus had wisely stopped splashing around. Seconds seemed to stretch into hours before the door finally burst open. Rhodey leaped inside, brandishing a suit gauntlet on his left arm and bracing it with his right, quickly surveying the room and pointing the weapon all around the room. He visibly relaxed and beckoned a second figure in, retracting the nanotech gauntlet into the reactor on his chest before prying the thing off and sticking it in a pocket in the toolbelt on his braces.

"It looks safe, but I don't know why FRIDAY gave the alert if there was nothing to worry about."

"She hasn't been updated in a while, not without…" Time seemed to stop for Tony once Pepper walked in the room, but Natasha kept him grounded with a hug from the side, squeezing gently and murmuring quietly. His eyes welled up with tears, and the dead genius was rendered utterly speechless for the first time in what felt like years. Tony was utterly paralyzed in her presence and watched the scene unfold with Natasha.

"I think she's doing ok, Pepper. FRIDAY's still _years_ ahead of her time. He left a whole lot more good in the world than we realize."

Pepper laughed softly. "I guess you're right about that."

The two smiled with tears of bittersweet reminiscence in their eyes, unaware of the other pair in the room doing the same. However, the silence seemed convenient to the unseen platypus, who promptly decided to start making noise again.

_Splash!_

"What was that?" asked Pepper, jumping in surprise.

"I don't know, but I think that it came from the toilet-"

_Slosh, slosh, slosh._

"Dammit. Pepper, I need you to pass me the plunger from that closet and turn on all the lights. I'll hold the lid down."

_Splishy-splashy, splishy-splashy._

"All set, Rhodey."

_[Insert watery sound effect here]_

"I'm about to open it, do you think you can help me out if it starts spraying everywhere?"

"Of course."

"On three. One, two, three- SHIT!"

The platypus had somehow leaped from the toilet into Rhodey's arms, drenching him and splashing water everywhere. Rhodey and Pepper stared in horror.

The platypus stared back.

Tony could again swear up and down that the little thing winked. Then all hell broke loose as it started thrashing in Rhodey's grasp, who shrieked and dropped it.

"Get the door get the door get the door!" he yelped, grabbing the plunger and jabbing it at the little mammal. It was skittering all over the floor to either avoid the plunger's plunging or cause maximum chaos. The ghostly spectators suspected the latter.

"I'm trying, but I locked it!" Pepper shot back while struggling frantically with the door. She screeched in alarm as the platypus went after her instead, chased off by Rhodey, who crashed into her when it slipped away. The two untangled and split off. Pepper climbed the nearby sink and kept trying to unlock the door as Rhodey swung with his plunger from a perch on the toilet.

The platypus seemed to be having the time of its life terrorizing the two of them but seemed to know its reign of terror was drawing to a close. Pepper had unlocked the door and was guarding it with both zeal and an aggressively waving towel that Rhodey was glancing at thoughtfully. He braced himself against the wall and snatched the bath towel that Tony and Natasha were hiding behind from the rack on the door and turned back towards the platypus.

"Pepper, we'll have to cover it up and grab it on the count of three. Ready?"

"No, I'd like to spend the next half hour yelling at a platypus and standing on your sink. Of course, Rhodey."

"Here we go then- one, two, three!"

They dropped their towels over the annoying mammal in almost perfect sync, springing into action once it was covered. Pepper lifted the wriggling bundle up and Rhodey secured it with another towel.

"Where do we put it?" Pepper was frantic and on the verge of shouting.

"The shower!" Rhodey replied in a similar manner, pulling the door back.

"Got it!" Pepper rushed to drop the perturbed platypus in the shower, where it passed through Tony's face. With that, Natasha finally started cracking up at the look on his face.

Rhodey practically slammed the door shut, and all was quiet for a solid ten seconds with the potential exception of Natasha's laughter, inaudible to the living. Pepper broke the 'silence' with a choked snorting noise, and Rhodey turned to face her. She was red all over and visibly shaking.

"Are you alright?"

And the dam broke.

"BWAHAHAHAHA! That was so-" Pepper was consumed by a fit of laughter. Of course, Rhodey couldn't help but join her in it at the sheer absurdity of the situation. Natasha shook her head and chuckled as a fourth voice joined them. She looked over, and Tony was in utter hysterics at his prank's success. He had been dead silent the entire time, taking in the spectacle with wide eyes and a blank expression. Natasha smiled, glad to see him happy in spite of seeing an unreachable Pepper again.

* * *

As all good things do, the laughter filling the room eventually faded and came to an end. Pepper wiped the lingering happy tears from her eyes, but Tony was satisfied to see that the smile never left her face.

Pepper was the first to start talking again. "What do you think we should do with it?"

"The platypus? I'd try to find out if it lives around here or see if we can give it to somebody who knows what they're doing. Let's come back to it in the morning and I'll see if I can settle it in for the night."

"Alright. I'll see you tomorrow, preferably with a wildlife handler on call. That reminds me… Morgan is wondering when she'll see her Uncle Rhodey again. Do you think you can visit anytime soon?"

Rhodey smiled. "Maybe this weekend, definitely the next. And as long as she doesn't climb anything that would make me suit up to get her down, I'm game."

"I'll make sure to tell her that. No repeats of last time. And Rhodey?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you. This was-" Pepper gestured to the mess in the bathroom, lost for words.

"A disaster. Tell you what, I'm not telling anyone until that thing in my shower is gone. Good night, Pepper."

"Good night, Rhodey." And with that, Pepper left the room.

Rhodey stood still for a moment and shook his head, surveying the room. He started to clean it, picking things up from where they had been knocked to the floor. "Damn platypus," he grumbled. "Of course it had to be a platypus. Not even a rat or a frog. A platypus! Do they even live around here? What do I do with it? Good lord, this seems like something Tony would pull!"

He paused, as if shocked by the words that had slipped out so effortlessly. "Wish you were here to see this, Tones." Rhodey murmured. When he had finished, he took a washcloth and soaked it in cold water from the sink. Tony and Natasha looked on in confusion as he approached the shower. He quickly slid the shower door open, dropped the wet washcloth in front of the platypus, and shut it. "There you go, you little coincidence. Drink from it, roll in it, I don't care. Do your platypus thing in there until I can kick you out." Rhodey walked out of the bathroom, muttering something about FRIDAY deleting all audio recordings and not being able to use his own bathroom without a pervy platypus watching.

Sensing that their time to watch anything interesting was up, Natasha pulled Tony after her back into the hallway. She watched him expectantly.

Tony blinked at her before launching into a recap of the whole thing. "Holy shit, Red! Did you get all of that? They thought it was Sam, then the platypus jumped clean out of the toilet at Rhodey like a dog and then they started yelling and climbing on things it couldn't reach-"

"Tony."

"And they had to throw things at it to keep it down! Rhodey, defending himself with nothing but a plunger from another platypus? That was hilarious! Pepper was so freaked out trying to get the door, I kinda regret that part but the whole thing was amazing overall…"

"Tony."

"I didn't think it would go that well, best prank of my career by far. Who else can say that they summoned a platypus and put it in their best friend's toilet? This almost beats the time I unscrewed a chandelier at that one school my mother wanted to put me in. Terrible place, by the way-"

"_Tony._"

"Oh! I'm sorry, Nat. I cut you off, didn't I? What were you going to say?"

"Look behind you, Tony. We have a visitor."


	7. Chapter 7

_Author's Note: I have good news and bad news. Let's start with the bad news, but it isn't really that bad._

_Not that bad news- I'm terrible with schedules and deadlines. Don't expect consistent chapter length or updates._

_Now for the fun part!_

_Good news part one- You get this thing! _

_Good news part two- Fully established plot outline! _

_Good news part three- I have a few ideas for the classic post credits scenes at the end of this!_

* * *

"Look behind you, Tony. We have a visitor."

* * *

Tony whipped around to see a chuckling Stan hovering behind him, sitting at his eye level in a way that Morgan would surely describe as 'criss-cross applesauce'. Tony let out a breath that he didn't know he was holding in, sighing in relief.

"Can you not do that, please? I get too much of being snuck up on from Red over here, and the Scare Tony Stark Club has a waiting list of about five hundred people." Tony said.

Stan smiled. "I can try, Stark. Good to see you two settling in. Great work with the platypus, that's exactly the kind of thing we want to see."

"We?" asked Natasha, not missing a beat.

"The stone and I," Stan explained. "You've got new abilities to be used under a set of very specific rules, and Tony's already giving both of you a great example of using them. Simple, a subtle reminder, and somewhat out of the ordinary- as in discernible from everyday happenings. Not to mention the intention behind it." His eyes were glittering with amusement. "Good work so far, but the question is: What's next?"

Tony and Natasha looked at each other with uncertainty, but then Tony tilted his head at her, sure that she had an idea in mind. She nodded, drew in a breath, and started explaining. "While I was in the gym eavesdropping on Wilson and Barnes, I found out that Clint is back home on the farm. And just like Steve, he's retired. My guess is that he's not going to be in New York anytime soon."

Stan nodded in understanding, waiting for her to continue.

"What I had in mind was working together for another day or two and then splitting up to see our families, with weekly check-ins back here at the compound every Sunday at dusk. That way we can get more done on our own with the people we're closest to," Natasha finished.

"I'm liking it so far, but we have a lot to talk about later, Nat," said Tony. "Stan the man over there? Any comments from the peanut gallery?"

"Now there's a good idea. I wholeheartedly approve of having a good, solid plan like that one, but the potential problems with staying far apart really brings up something I've been meaning to talk to you about. Your new abilities."

Tony stiffened, still wary of magic in general and expecting a scolding. On the other hand, Natasha was leaning forwards, intrigued.

"What about 'em?" Tony asked.

"The stone and I have been further discussing the terms of your agreement. Don't worry, there haven't been any revisions that would put you at a distinct disadvantage, but I do have to elaborate on a few expanded parts. First of all, your energy reserves regenerate at the start of a new day. That doesn't mean your wake up time every day, but by then they'll be ready."

"So you're telling me that Cinderella's ghostly magic clock resets at midnight? Sounds like a fairy tale, but I'll take it." Tony said.

"The situation we're in is practically a fairy tale." Natasha remarked.

Stan smiled. "My thoughts exactly."

Tony snickered. "Do I get to be the damsel in distress? I can't get to my shining armor this time around."

"Fall out of your tower and I'll catch you," said Natasha, smirking. Tony pretended to faint into her arms.

"Alright, you two. Now for a more serious matter. Your new abilities and the deadline," said Stan. Tony opened his eyes and shot out of Natasha's grip. Both of them gave Stan their full attention with guarded looks on their faces. "The stone has agreed to grant you a grace period before the countdown begins to figure things out. Your plan has already given you a head start on that, but I'd still take the time to get back into the swing of things and practice your cool new powers."

"New powers?" asked Natasha.

"The stone and I have agreed on giving both of you teleportation from person to person and a telepathic link with one another in addition to the interaction you can have to the outside world. Both of these don't require nearly as much energy drawn from the stone, as it's much easier for the stone to perform person-to-person actions because they're close enough to the soul-to-soul actions of its domain," Stan explained.

"Tony here has already figured out how to interact with the outside world and ask for favors from the stone. It's just a matter of putting enough determination or push behind your thoughts for the stone to hear your call, and maybe reasoning with it a little bit for certain tasks like summoning a platypus. From there you just have to guide the energy or magic or whatever you want to call it with thoughts and feelings. You'll probably get good enough with it to do things almost automatically, like moving things."

"And the grace period? How will we know when it's over?" asked Tony.

"As for the grace period, you have a few days before the deadline is set. I will be there in person to tell you that it has ended when it's over. Just think of me as the middleman between you and the stone. Any questions?"

Natasha considered it, but then shook her head. Tony followed suit and then gasped. Much to their surprise, Stan had started glowing orange and quickly faded away, then thought better of it, reappearing. Tony jumped and gasped again. Natasha snorted at his antics but gave Stan a quizzical look.

"One more thing that I almost forgot. If somebody manages to figure it out before anybody else and could spill the beans, you can appear to them, explain the deal, and tell them to keep their lips sealed. After that, they can permanently see your ghost form. It only applies to whichever one of you is found out about, but from there it's easy for that person to figure out you're probably not the only one. See ya later, kids. Call if you need me!"

"Bye Stan! Thank you!" said Tony cheerfully, waving at Stan. Natasha gave Stan a respectful nod and a wave goodbye before he disappeared. She turned to Tony and raised an eyebrow.

"You're in a remarkably good mood," Natasha said.

"Uh, hello? A freaking grace period? Cool new powers to test out? C'mon, Nat! Let's go prank someone!"


	8. Chapter 8

Tony tore through the halls with Natasha in tow, searching for a new target with zeal and a manic gleam in his eyes. He was still riding the adrenaline high from jump scares and the outcome of his prank and was quick to show it.

"Tony, shouldn't we try to see what we can do first?" Natasha asked.

Tony paused mid-flight and looked up, eyes flicking all over the place as he considered the idea. He looked back to Natasha and grinned.

"I know just the place!" Tony said. "Under compound locations for $500, our next clue is: Where do the Avengers hone new abilities and train?"

"I was just in the gym earlier, Tony. But it's a good pick, it should be empty by now and there's plenty of space and equipment."

"Ding ding ding! We have our winner, folks! Let's get this show on the road."

They shot into the gym and took a look around. Upon seeing that it was empty save for the two of them, Tony and Natasha sank to just above the floor and surveyed the room again.

"You'd think it would have changed a bit after a few weeks of us being gone, but it still somehow looks brand new," Natasha remarked. "There's only one arrow in the far left target on the shooting range."

"Well, most of the compound was wrecked shortly before I died," Tony replied. "Wait, a few weeks?"

Natasha looked at him inquisitively. "You haven't told me about everything that happened after I died, but I have a feeling my answer will be a lot shorter. I spotted a newspaper back in Queens with the date on it. It's been two weeks since the day of the time heist, which I assume is when you died, right?"

"Yeah… A lot happened after Clint came back with just the soul stone. We got them all, but a few things happened that shouldn't have before everyone returned to 2023. Cap, Shrinky-Dink and I lost the Tesseract to Loki in 2012 so I took Steve back to SHIELD in the 70's to grab the damn thing and some Pym Particles for the ride home. I saw Howard, and oh boy was that a trip. Of course, it was nothing compared to Steve spotting Peggy while distracting the Hank Pym of the 70's and stealing from his lab,"

_That explains a lot, _Natasha mused. _That's probably how he got the idea to stay behind after presumably putting everything back._

Tony continued the summary. "If you think that's bad, it gets way worse. A past version of Nebula swapped places with our Nebula at some point and invited Past Thanos to crash the party on Present/Future/Past Earth or whatever you want to call it. We didn't know what was going on, but we assembled our gauntlet and Big Bruce the Zen Hulk unsnapped the Snap of Doom. Then the Compound got blown to hell because Past Thanos showed up and brought a warship and the Chitauri with him as his way more than plus one. A lot happened after that. The wizards dropped by and portaled in a metric crapload of reinforcements from all over the place. Wakandans, more wizards, the rest of the Avengers, and for all I know, Howard the Duck. Cap used Mjolnir, Pepper suited up and it was truly epic, I saw Peter again, Glowing Cap showed up and straight up broke the warship, we played keep away with the gauntlet and Peter had it for a little while right before the ladies teamed up. You would have loved it, Nat," Tony paused, eyes glistening with unshed tears.

"Pepper was absolutely stunning, of course. Wanda just let loose all over Thanos when she got the chance, and I forgot when that was. Awesome Princess Sparklefists almost got him too, but nothing stood a chance until the very end." Tony stopped talking, lost to the world down memory lane. Natasha took the chance to prompt him and pull him back into the monologue.

"If Bruce was the one to undo the Snap, then how did you die in such a way to put you in the Soul Stone?" Natasha asked, but she had a sinking feeling as to how it all had ended.

"Thanos completed the gauntlet again, this time to snap our universe out of existence and create a new one of his own twisted vision. I grappled with him myself, but it was almost too late. He finally snapped, but nothing happened because I had stolen the stones. I snapped him and his army out of existence. The wizard had reminded me of the one possibility out of millions from across the battlefield, and when I saw him with the stones again I knew there was no other way to put him down for good. I was dead in minutes from the gamma radiation, long enough for a few people to say goodbye. The ones that mattered, except for my daughter…" Tony's voice cut off completely.

Natasha put an arm around him and took his hand. "I'm sorry, Tony. I wish I could have been there to help."

"There wasn't anything you could have done." Tony whispered. They hovered in heavy silence for a moment, unsure of what to say but knowing exactly what to do. At last, Natasha spoke up.

"Have you seen Steve yet?"

"No, why do you ask?" Tony replied, puzzled.

"Sam has the name and shield of Cap now. As for Steve… you'll have to see. He's just outside, like he's waiting for something."

"I'll have to go check on him. And how the hell did you see where he is if the door is right behind you?"

Natasha smirked. "As usual, Tony, I have eyes in the back of my head. You know, to better scare people with. Go see Steve. I'll wait here."

"Wish me luck, Romanoff. We'll have to practice later."

"You won't need it, Mr. Stank."

Tony laughed and flew outside, phasing through the door.

_Author's Note: I'm baaaack…_

_And there's our setup for next time chapter. Hope you've enjoyed the fic so far, whether you're a new or returning reader. Special thanks to everybody who also favorites, follows, and reviews!_


	9. Chapter 9

Tony flew through the door, still smiling over the stupid "Mr. Stank" joke. He shot forward onto the partially restored lawn past an old man sitting on a bench and looked around, half expecting Steve to be out running laps around the compound or helping rebuild by moving heavy things out of the way.

"Where'd you go, boy scout? Break an arm recently? New scars? Nat mentioned something happened, I'd like to hear it from you. We both know how spies can get about…" Tony was in the middle of turning himself around to survey the area when he did a double take at the old man on the bench, faltering completely. "Cap?"

Tony took a moment to try and verify or debunk his own guess. He took in the old man's features. Same blue eyes and facial structure. Ok, sure, lots of old guys probably had that eye color and maybe a few would keep their good looks as the years went by. Although he also had the typical old guy body, it certainly looked well kept from what was probably a career as a bodybuilder or pro athlete- or someone with the super-soldier serum doing that job for them.

_Dammit, Tony! Pick a side! _Tony scolded himself. But the more he tried to convince himself it couldn't possibly be Steve, the more he was sure it was him. He just had to wait for definitive proof that didn't seem like a weird coincidence.

_There! _Tony was shaking in anticipation as the old man pulled a ringing cell phone from his pocket. _What an outdated model. Could it really be him?_

The man on the bench answered the call with a smile. "Hey Peg."

There was a pause as the caller responded that Tony took as an opportunity to freak out. "What the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck…" he whispered, eyes wide and mind racing. _Why is he old? Is that really Peggy Carter, my dead Aunt Peggy that he's talking to? Is there some time travel shenanigans going on right now? Wait, was he the one to take the stones back? _

Tony's flood of thoughts stopped in its tracks as he watched the Maybe Steve chuckle at something from the call and respond. "Yes, the boys will be joining us for dinner. I promise they'll be on their best behavior this time around. Coats, boots, and weapons checked at the door."

Probably Steve's grin faded to something more pained and longing after the next pause. "She said they couldn't make it tonight because Morgan has school tomorrow. I've been trying to reach out, Peg, I really have been, but maybe you're right- they do need space."

Tony jumped forward, barely stopping himself in time from snatching the phone away.

_Morgan? Morgan!_

Tony slapped himself on the wrist and resorted to floating in circles around Almost Steve and continued eavesdropping.

"Yes, ma'am. I'll be back in time for dinner. Love you, dear," Most Likely Steve said, smiling softly. "Bye."

Tony peered over the man's shoulder, watching him flip the phone shut. The old man slumped into the slight curve of the bench against his back and sighed. Tony hovered quietly, waiting for him to do something to confirm his identity.

Tony waited impatiently, zipping around the bench in circles and occasionally pacing midair. He was just about to leave and report back to Natasha when he heard Somewhat Steve speak up again.

"Hey Nat. It's been a while since we've talked, or really since I've thought out loud in the hopes that it would somehow reach you. Not a day goes by when we haven't missed you."

Tony whipped around and stopped dead in his tracks, taking a moment to breathe and process what he just heard. Definitely Steve continued his talk.

"Don't give me that look, you know the Bartons miss their Auntie Nat. Peggy never got to watch you spar or dance or see you in person. Thor's off-world again, so I have no idea how he's doing, but I'm sure that's how he's working through all of this loss. Bruce has thrown himself into his work again and all of the labs are still off limits. Hell, most of the gym is exactly as you left it. Nobody wants to touch the Widow's old stuff."

Tony drew closer, taking note of Steve's fragile, bittersweet smile as he drew a shaky breath and continued.

"As for me… it's been years of waiting. Waiting to step back into the life I had before staying behind, and all I could do was watch and hope I would live until then. It was a hard five years until Peggy came back from being snapped and even harder to know my team was hurting or gone the whole time. And when I finally could, it turns out the serum couldn't keep up with me for that long,"

"I kept busy running therapy groups under a false name until the snap was reversed and I could do it less often under my own name. Well, now it's Steven Carter, Steven Carter-Rogers, or Grant Carter, depending on who you ask and when. It was easier to stay under the radar like that back in the day. And I guess I got so caught up in helping others through everything lately that I never worked out my own issues, which is why I like to take the time to talk to you, though it's closer to thinking out loud and hoping you can hear it."

Steve took out a worn square of cloth from his pocket and wiped stray tears from his face. _A freaking handkerchief?_ Tony thought absentmindedly. _Christ, he's old._

"Well, that brings me to another unresolved issue, Nat. I'll talk to him about it, I promise you. Goodbye for now."

Tony hovered above the open side of the bench, curious as to what Steve had to say next. But his patience only held out so long, and just as he was about to leave he heard Steve speak up again.

"Tony."

He froze and slowly turned back towards the old super soldier, wondering whether he had heard anything at all.

"It's been a while, hasn't it?"

Tony sank down onto the ground, walking softly and silently to take a seat on the bench beside Steve. He never once noticed the unconsciously activated orange glow around his feet that flared with each step, or the tiny clover flowers that swayed as he passed by. He was entirely fixated on what Steve was going to say to him.

"Everybody's been missing you, Stark. The world will never forget its genius billionaire playboy philanthropist superhero. You left one hell of a mark on it to leave the entire universe knowing your name as well."

Tony sat beside Steve on the bench, intrigued and hanging on his every word.

"But while everyone's been mourning Iron Man, the truth is that I miss Tony Stark."

Tony turned and gaped at his (literally) old teammate. _He had years to move on and knew what was coming, and yet he still somehow misses me, his stubborn jackass of a former rival? We fought like Tesla and Edison over all kinds of shit- Ultron, the Accords, his best friend, losing the fight against Thanos, and he still cares?_

"When I woke up from the ice, almost everyone I knew was long gone. I had nothing left of them but memories and things currently missing, destroyed, or kept in museums. But the only thing that made a difference to me then was their legacies."

"I was in a really bad place back then- lost, confused, and forced to sink or swim. After I accepted the fact that the world had moved on and I had to catch up, I found out about the wonderful things my friends had left behind. Families I could connect with, amazing life stories, and even international organizations. I was absurdly proud to hear about what I thought was Peggy and Howard's greatest creation: SHIELD. But that was before I realized it was something different than I thought it would be, with HYDRA pulling all the strings. And it was before I heard about you."

Tony was beyond shocked at what he was hearing. _It can't possibly get any more surprising than this…_

"I was overjoyed to find out that my friend had a kid that turned out to be smarter than he was. I didn't think that was possible at the time, and then I started hearing about all of the great things he did. Building circuit boards before he could ride a bike. Graduating from MIT before other kids his age were considering applying to it. Surviving loss after loss, turning the focus of a worldwide company completely around, and building a marvelous flying suit- more than once! I was thrilled and couldn't wait to meet you, but then I started hearing about the bad things. Rumors and SHIELD files blinded me from all of the good you could do. One of my greatest regrets is that it took seeing you carry a missile to realize it again."

Tony definitely wasn't crying. His eyeballs were just leaking, that's all. Nothing a good smack with a wrench couldn't fix.

"And then I forgot. Over and over again. We both made mistakes, but perhaps my biggest one was never forgiving you until it was too late. It was never like that with you, Tony. You gave the Avengers a home, funding, upgrades, and so much support through the years. You always poured yourself into fixing everything, and I wish I could have stopped you from giving too much. It wish it had been me to take the stones and snap Thanos away, and hold on long enough to say sorry and goodbye before it was too late."

Both men were openly weeping by then. Tony reached out to hug Steve but passed clean through him. His shoulders heaved and he started crying harder. Tony panicked over the fact that he couldn't help Steve and started to do the same. It took a minute or two for Steve to calm down enough to finish and for Tony to calm down enough to listen. Steve blew his nose, sniffled, and shakily finished his speech.

"Tony, if you're out there, I just want you to know that I never forgave you often enough or soon enough than I should have. You deserved so much better than what you got, and for that I am so sorry. I wish I had done more or had been the one to die instead. Please forgive me."

The two of them relapsed into sobbing uncontrollably. "I do, Steve, I really do!" Tony cried. His arms kept passing through Steve, who shook ever so slightly each time they did so. "Dammit, Rogers! I'm right here!"

Tony pulled away and sat to Steve's left on the bench, tears pouring onto his face and tracing down his cheeks. "I'm right here." He buried his face in his hands, still crying little glowing droplets that hung from his ghostly skin. He didn't even care that they were sliding off there and onto the bench, and that when he finally lifted his head he was getting a confused look in his general direction from Steve, and then one of slowly dawning comprehension that turned into shock. He just kicked his softly glowing feet, not realizing that he was moving the grass under them, and turned to run off so he could mope and regret things in peace.

_Why the fuck was he looking at me? I can't even have a good cry as a ghost without getting looked at funny…_

"Tony?"

"What?" Tony replied absentmindedly.

"Is that really you?"

"Yeah, sure… WAIT, YOU CAN SEE ME?"

* * *

_Author's Note: I may or may not have cried while writing this. _

_We've passed the 15k word mark, people! Thanks for the support so far, I love reading any reviews you leave me! :D_


	10. Chapter 10

_Author's Note: Ten chapters! Woot woot!_

* * *

Tony and Steve took a moment to stare at each other until their tear-stained faces lit up with brilliant smiles and they shattered the silence hanging in the air.

"Oh my God, you're here! You're really here!"

"Someone can see me! Holy shit, Steve, you can see me!"

Tony whooped and flew in circles around Steve in a glowing, orange blur. The rush of air messed up Steve's well-groomed hair, so naturally Tony laughed at the strange sight.

"Tony!" Steve mock-scolded him. "Not the hair!"

"Then what else do I get to play with, old man?"

"Well, back in my day we had hoops, sticks, and dirt to play with so you'll have to make do like we did, young man."

"Cheeky old prune."

"You take that back!"

They laughed with the tears of bittersweet reunion hanging in their eyes. But when Tony rushed to embrace Steve and passed clean through him, they finally began to fall. Tony flew back to his front side and they just stared at each other, laughing and crying even harder than before.

"I'm so sorry-"

"Steve, it's not your fault."

"There were so many things I could have done better!"

"Maybe. Every single day of my life I told myself the same thing and took a daily bath in my own regrets. Where did that get me? Pretty much nowhere until I went to make sure it didn't happen again. Point is, Steve, shit happens. It just does."

The area around the bench went dead silent for a few minutes as Steve and Tony wiped their faces and stared at each other awkwardly.

"That means apology accepted, you old coot."

Steve busted out laughing and only stopped when he started wheezing. "Sharp as ever, Tony."

"I would hope so! How the hell are you still so buff, Rogers?" Tony asked.

Steve smirked. "The serum, of course. That and the boys are running me ragged trying to keep them in check."

"So Wilson got the shield and name?"

"Couldn't have found a better successor, and Buck wouldn't have wanted it anyway."

"Good pick," Tony remarked. "How's Aunt Peg?"

"She's doing well. Still dangerous with any firearm in her hands, of course. We have Sunday evening dinners with whoever can come over, but tonight it's just us, Bucky, and Sam," Steve replied. "You'd be welcome to stop by, but what I'd like to know is how in the world you're around to be talking with me right now."

Tony sucked in a breath, fidgeting with his hands behind his back. "Long story, but to put it simply I woke up in the soul stone and refused to go on. Then I took up a deal to either prove myself and return or fail and get stuck in it forever."

"Well, damn." Steve said, amazed. "Back from the dead or on your way to it already? I wonder…"

"What?"

"You had an infinity stone related death that probably put you there, so you might not be the only one-" Steve stopped abruptly at seeing the massive, shit-eating grin Tony was wearing. "You've gotta be kidding me."

Tony smiled even wider at the comprehending look on his face. "Natasha's here too?" Steve asked.

Tony felt a buzz in the back of his head and heard Natasha's voice in his mind. _Tony, I just started glowing orange. What's happening?_

_Come outside, Nat!_

"Steve, you can ask her that yourself."

Natasha was by his side in a flash, still lit up like a Christmas tree. "Tony, what's going on?"

"Nat, meet Old Steve. Old Steve, meet Nat. This is the part where you shake hands and acknowledge each other's existence, guys."

Natasha and Steve stared at each other.

"Um, guys?"

They continued to stare at each other.

"Guys?"

Nothing happened.

"This is getting weird."

"Zip it, Tony. Hi, Steve," Natasha greeted, finally responding. "You can see me?"

Steve smiled. "I thought that spies didn't like to be seen, Nat. Good to have you back."

Natasha returned the grin. "You too, Rogers. You too. How have things been?"

Steve exhaled slowly, releasing the last of the tension in his shoulders. "Half the universe is back again thanks to both of you. I feel like I should be celebrating, but the world just lost two of its best defenders. More importantly, I just lost two of my best friends and their families are grieving. There's still more I can do with my life but I don't know what to do besides keep moving."

Nat attempted to place a hand on his shoulder, but when it swiped through she left it hovering just above his body. Tony wriggled closer to them from his spot on the bench.

"How's the afterlife been treating you?"

"It's orange, watery, and dull. Glad Tony and I could make it back."

"Not what I was expecting, but I'm glad too. Do either of you have any dinner plans?"

Natasha grinned. "Dead people usually don't have dinners to go to, I'd be honored. Tony?"

"Can't wait to crash the party!" Tony's wicked grin matched hers, and Steve laughed. A voice behind all three of them spoke up.

"And speaking of crashing parties… Hello, Steven. We haven't officially met quite yet."

Natasha rolled her eyes as Steve and Tony jumped off the bench and stared at the third apparition joining them. Tony, flustered, blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"Damn it, Stan!"

* * *

_Author's Note: And there's Stan interrupting another chapter. Thank you so much for the patience and support so far; any reviews, follows, or favorites I see always make my day. Tune in next time for dinner at the Carter-Rogers household (that's your only hint as to something special I have planned)!_


	11. Chapter 11

_Author's Note: It turns out I'm not dead. Hope you don't mind cheesy sitcom scripts for when the dinner scene comes up!_

"What, am I not allowed to visit my two favorite ghosts?" Stan said in mock horror. "As all the kids are saying these days, I feel attacked."

"Not all of them. But next time you visit, try not to kill me a second time with a heart attack." Tony replied.

"No, keep it up. It's funny when he jumps." Natasha deadpanned. Tony glared at her and gestured at Stan to continue.

"Hi Steve. My name's Stan, and seeing as you've figured out our little game of souls, it's about time you knew how it worked."

"Rules? Are there a few for me, too?" Steve asked. Stan nodded appreciatively.

"Of course, we can't have you running around and doing all of the work for these two. The rules on their part are easy to follow and came with the bargain. For starters, they can only perform actions using limited amounts of the soul stone's energy, and the allowance refreshes daily. They can't directly contact someone and tell them of their return because people have to figure it out indirectly from clues and actions. This all has to be done to prove to the stone that they need to return to Earth and would be better off there than in the afterlife or with the stone."

Steve considered it with a tilt of his head. "So I would somehow have to comply with these rules, presumably by keeping it quiet?"

"Exactly. No intentional hints to anyone else, direct or indirect as they may be if you wish to interact with our ghosts from here on out. You will still count among their successes even if you break the rules, but you won't remember that they're still alive and they will be forbidden by the stone to contact you." Stan responded.

"Gotcha. I'm in."

"Excellent! And before I go- great work so far to my floating friends over here. Your connections to each other and the stone are really powering up. Keep it up, and I can't wait to see what you do with them. Bye!" Stan disappeared with a loud 'bamf' noise and a puff of purple smoke.

Nobody spoke for a few moments until Steve's stomach growled.

"Who's up for dinner at my place?" he asked.

ACT ONE, SCENE ELEVEN-ISH

CARTER-ROGERS HOUSE, EVENING

_The scene opens from the outside on a modest one-floor house with a basement. It's painted white with a blue roof and accents and has a few well-kept red rose bushes out in front. Smooth jazz plays and a title written in a golden, dancing script slowly fades into and out of view. It reads: Good Will Haunting- The Sitcom Episode. The setting changes to a busy kitchen, where a silver-haired woman is softly stirring a pot of soup on top of an oven and swaying to the music, which is coming from a radio on a nearby ledge. There's a series of small knocks at the door, and she frowns but continues her work. The knocking pauses, then grows louder and more persistent. _

STEVE: Peggy! I'm home!

_PEGGY turns and makes eye contact with the camera and smirks. There's a clever, mischievous glint in her eyes, reminiscent of the chaos she caused in her younger years. She starts to hum louder, ignoring the knocking and the audience laughs._

STEVE: C'mon, Peg! I know you can hear me!

_PEGGY finally turns down the radio and bustles through the rest of the kitchen, the dining area, and the living room to the back door, unlocking and opening it with a smile on her face. STEVE CARTER-ROGERS enters, ducking through the doorway. The audience claps and cheers. STEVE accepts the applause bashfully and smiles at his wife._

STEVE: I brought you something, darling.

PEGGY: Thank you, Steven. But you're still late and so are the boys.

_The audience snickers. STEVE blushes, shushes them, and hands her a few fresh roses from behind his back. PEGGY takes them gently and tousles his hair from below with her free hand._

STEVE: I was held up for a moment visiting a few people at the compound.

PEGGY: I thought you would be, now that things are finally starting up again around there.

_She pauses and turns back towards the kitchen, remembering the soup._

PEGGY: Would you be a dear and put the roses in the vase for me? I have to finish up with dinner.

STEVE: Of course. I'll handle our visitors.

_PEGGY hands STEVE the roses and leaves the room. He puts the roses in a vase on the coffee table in the living room. It's small and tastefully decorated, much like the rest of the house. There's an artificial fireplace, two couches, two armchairs, various pictures hanging on the walls, and a record player in the corner beside a bookcase. STEVE sits down on one of the couches. Suddenly the room dims, brightens, and the pictures start swaying in unison. Two people offscreen are saying, "ooooooOOOOOOoooooo…" He sighs._

STEVE: Tony, Nat, knock it off. I know it's you.

_Giggling from a male voice fills the room, and two transparent, orange figures materialize in front of STEVE. TONY and NATASHA have arrived. The audience cheers and claps loudly._

NATASHA: Told you it was too over the top.

TONY: So says the one who wanted us to show up in sheets and ask if it was Halloween yet.

STEVE: All this fuss for little old me? I'm flattered, guys. I really am.

TONY: I'm sure you are. By the way- nice place, Rogers.

NATASHA: Yeah, where do you keep the weapons?

_Cue the soft laughter from the audience._

STEVE: Locked in the closet when the boys bring them over.

_There's a slight pause. NATASHA raises an eyebrow, expecting a different answer._

STEVE: Oh, you meant _our_ stash. You see, there's a set of knives in the kitchen, Peggy's three pistols in the safe, sometimes the shield hanging above the fireplace, a bat behind the front door, ninja stars from the Bartons…

_The audience laughs and NATASHA smiles._

STEVE: And sometimes Bucky, especially if he doesn't get enough sleep. He bites.

NATASHA: I don't doubt it.

TONY: Say, Cap, when's everyone else showing up for dinner?

STEVE: They're still on their way. I bet you're getting real hungry at the smell of that soup, it's simply-

_STEVE pauses, smirks, looks at the camera, and then looks at the ghosts._

STEVE: -to die for.

_The audience laughs as TONY and NATASHA roll their eyes in perfect sync. TONY looks like he's about to say something, but is interrupted by scuffling and arguing coming from outside the front door. There's a loud thump followed by silence, and the doorbell finally rings just once. STEVE gets up to answer it._

STEVE: I'll get the door, Peg!

_STEVE opens it and reveals BUCKY holding SAM in a headlock. The audience cheers. SAM is muttering threats at BUCKY, and he smiles and clamps a hand over SAM's mouth._

BUCKY (_jokingly_): Hiya, Steve. How's the missus?

STEVE: Ask her yourself, Buck. Let Sam go and she'll consider feeding you dinner too. How are you, Sam?

SAM (_still stuck in a headlock_): Mmmrf.

_SAM bites the hand clamped over his mouth. Canned laughter erupts from the audience. BUCKY makes a strangled yelping noise, suddenly releasing him. BUCKY glares and rubs his injured hand with his metal one._

SAM: I'm doing well, Cap. Pretty roses you've got over there.

_SAM smirks and STEVE returns the look. BUCKY doesn't notice, he's too busy moping._

STEVE: Why thank you, Cap.

_BUCKY looks up and groans, his 'sorrows' forgotten._

BUCKY: Not this shit again.

SAM: You're welcome, Cap!

_PEGGY appears in the doorway. She grins._

PEGGY: If I have to hear _that_ routine one more time I'm throwing spoons at all of you. Weapons in the closet because food's on the table!

_She quickly exits with the 'ghosts' slinking off after her. SAM and BUCKY begin removing their weapons and leaving them in a nearby closet._

TONY (_shouting_): HOORAY, FOOD!

_STEVE jumps and quickly shoots a grumpy look at TONY. Thankfully, SAM and BUCKY didn't notice in their hurry to be the first one done and at the table. The audience laughs and bursts into applause as the words "To be continued…" appear on screen._


End file.
